Wedding Gifts – Presents vs Money

wedding gifts

Wedding gifts come in all shapes and sizes. Some are chosen from the gift registry the happy couple have put together at a couple local (or online) stores. Others aren’t, and are something the gift giver thinks (or hopes) the couple will like and use. Sometimes the gift isn’t something that comes in a prettily wrapped box, but in the form of cash or a check in an envelope.

Earlier today I read an article that was questioning whether giving a monetary gift instead of one that is purchased, wrapped, and tied up with a pretty bow. No, it wasn’t meaning if asking for money instead of a present is wrong, but whether giving money instead of a present is wrong.

While the article didn’t come up with an end all/be all answer, no definitive right or wrong, it did give some food for thought to help determine wrapped present vs money.

It mentioned some pros and cons – such as “a physical gift will be remembered and cherished for a long time. Cash is appreciated in the short term,” and that “some couples also don’t want any gifts . . . and would prefer that a donation be made to their favorite charities or organizations.”

A wonderful tip the writer offers regarding giving money is to “write something meaningful in the card about how you hope they spend it . . . so that they don’t think you just stopped at an ATM on the way to the ceremony.”

But to suggest or make someone thing that giving money is wrong . . .

I mean, a gift is a gift. The gift giver can give whatever he/she wants to.

Why Is Another Bride Angry Over A Wedding Gift?

Did the couple register for gifts? Even if they did, giving money, (or giving something not on the list) is the givers choice. After all, a gift registry is not a list of the only options that the gift giver can choose. Instead, it is a list of items the couple would like to have.

So, would it be nice, would it be a good idea to choose a gift from the registry, instead of going rogue? Well, yes, because the giver knows that the couple will in fact like and use the item.

But, what is given, be it a boxed, wrapped present, or a card with money, remains the choice of the giver, not of the receiver.

So what are your thoughts on giving money as a gift?

Check out the article here Faux Pas Or Not: Money As A Gift.

Hearts, Joy, Love!
Jean

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Need wedding planning tips and ideas? Contact me at jean@weddingsfromtheheart.net or at 937-235-2586 or 937-581-3647!

The Rising Costs of Being A Wedding Guest

The newspaper headline said, “It’s getting pricier to be a wedding guest.” Naturally I had to read it.

Why is it getting pricier? The article didn’t really say, other than citing wedding gifts, travel to the wedding locale, attire, and other wedding related festivities. But haven’t those expenditures always been linked to attending a wedding in some shape or form?

It also cites that weddings used to be community affairs where friends and family members took care of the food, photos, music, etc. So how does this really affect what it costs to attend a wedding?

While the article doesn’t give any clear explanation, think of it this way . . .

Where the wedding is held

Weddings were community affairs as the bride and groom were often from (and possibly still lived in) the same town, as did their families and friends. Everyone knew everyone. Meaning . . . the wedding took place where everyone was.

Fast forward to today . . .

College and job prospects now take the bride and groom away from the towns where they grew up. So, where to have the wedding? The bride’s home town? The groom’s? Maybe the town where they currently live? Either way, many people will have to travel beyond just driving across town.

So if they have to travel anyway, why not a destination wedding?

Travel = airfare and lodging. An expenditure that didn’t exist in the times of “community affair” weddings.

Gifts from the wedding guests

The article also shares a couple views of increasing costs of wedding gifts that I can only explain as faulty logic:

1. Your gift should be “equivalent to how well you’re wined and dined” by the bride and groom.

Um, no.

Your gift is a GIFT. Merriam-Webster defines ‘gift’ as “a thing given willingly to someone without payment.” What you choose to give the couple is not compensation for what they paid for their event.

2. “People instinctively knew what a couple needed to start housekeeping.”

Guess what. People still know this. They haven’t forgotten. However, couples are typically older and have established a household already by the time they get married. They have pots and pans, tablecloths, bed linens and whatnot needed to “start housekeeping.”

Is it getting pricier to be a wedding guest. Absolutely. The dynamics of weddings have changed.

But then again isn’t everything (groceries, filling the gas tank, seeing a movie, . . .)?

Hearts, Joy, Love!
Jean

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Are you looking for unique ideas for your wedding? Weddings From The Heart can help. Contact me today at 937-235-2586 or 937-581-3647, or by email at jean@weddingsfromtheheart.net!

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