Fun Tips For Including Children In The Wedding Party
Some couples want an adult-only wedding party. However, for other couples, their wedding wouldn’t be right without children in the wedding party. In fact, many European weddings have only children as attendants – think royal weddings!
If you are planning on including children in your wedding party, and wondering what they can do, here are some points to keep in mind.
The roles of flower girl and ring bearer are the most obvious, and are often what first comes to mind when thinking of children in the wedding party. However, there are other roles they can play. Be sure to consider the age (and personality) of the child before assigning a particular role.
For young children, (aged 3 – 6) the traditional roles of flower girl and ring bearer are best suited, as are sign carriers, and bell ringers. Their roles are quite simple – walk down the aisle while carrying the role-appropriate accessory. The traditional choices are a cute basket of flower petals and pretty ring pillow, but a small bouquet or floral pomander for the flower girl, or a wooden box, bird’s nest, or stack of books for the ring bearer are great alternatives. Just make sure the rings are securely tied to the accessory (or better yet, use fake rings).
Carrying a sign that says something like “Here comes the bride!”, or “I’m just here for the cake” are cute, and perfect for a little guy (or girl). They can hold the sign, or you can get them with ribbon to be placed around their neck.
And you can’t get much easier than having a bell ringer. (Just make sure the child knows when not to be ringing the bell).
Children aged 7 – 10 can do more intensive duties, such as candle-bearers or prayer book carriers. They can also hand out programs and be guest book greeters as guests arrive.
Pre-teens and early teens, (aged 11 – 15) can take on the role of junior bridesmaid, junior ushers, and junior groomsmen, with wedding ceremony duties the same as their grown up counterparts.
Or they can do other wedding ceremony duties such as being a reader, walk the bride down the aisle, or serve as an usher.
I just love the following suggestion from Wedding Bee:
“Hire” Your Kids to Be Photographers. From a child’s perspective (figuratively and literally) you’ll get some cherished photos.
Other tips and suggestions for including children in the wedding party:
• Do you or your partner have any children together, or from a previous marriage/relationship? Seriously consider including them in the wedding party.
• Encourage the childrens’ parents to have their children practice walking at home while carrying a small pillow or box, pretending to drop petals from a basket, etc.
• At the rehearsal, have someone show them what to do rather than just tell them. “Drop petals while you’re walking,” or “hold the pillow with both hands” can be interpreted quite differently by a little guy or gal vs the grown-up giving the instructions.
• Remember that age is just a guideline, and to consider the child’s personality. There are “young” four year olds, and there are “old” four year olds, and that will affect how they act (and react) on the wedding day.
• How the child acts at the rehearsal is no guarantee that they will act likewise on the wedding day. I have seen children throw tantrums and absolutely refuse to participate in the rehearsal, only to act like little pros on the wedding day itself. And on the flip side, I have seen children who were cooperative at the rehearsal get “stage fright” at the ceremony.
• There’s safety in numbers, so pair up little ones for their trek down the aisle instead of having them enter individually.
• Prepare yourself for a flower girl, ring bearer, etc. who won’t go down the aisle at all. Remember why you included them in your wedding party (because they are special to you, not to fill a role).
• Have the childrens’ parents seated in an aisle row near the front, (or even in the front row if there’s room), so the child can sit with them during the ceremony, and have them armed with a favorite (unmessy) snack.
Photo Credits:
Flower Girl and Ring Bearers – Aka Hige via Flickr (CC BY-SA 2.0)
Ring Bearer Sign – Photo 93672979 © Christi Tolbert | Dreamstime
Bell Ringer – Tricia via Flickr (CC BY 2.0)
Junior Bridesmaids – Adam Red via Flickr (CC BY-SA 2.0)
Hearts, Joy, Love!
Jean
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