You’re in the midst of planning your wedding (maybe getting to the end of the planning phase itself), and now it’s time to start thinking about the specifics of your ceremony. One of the biggest decisions is how are the key people involved going to enter? What is the right Wedding Processional Order?
First of all, we’re going to talk about the traditional Wedding Processional Order for a Christian ceremony. (I’m a firm believer of starting with “the rules,” then adjusting them to fit you), and where everyone stands or sits once they reach the front.
Then, because there is no one-size-fits-all scenario, I’ll give you several variations and alternatives to the traditional processional order.
Then we’ll talk about the traditional Wedding Processional Order for Jewish ceremonies, as there are several key differences here.
Traditional Wedding Processional Order (Christian Ceremony)
While the following is the traditional order for a Christian wedding ceremony, the same order is often applied to secular weddings.
Technically, only the people in the wedding party are considered to be part of the processional. The grandparents, the groom’s parents, and the bride’s mother are not part of the processional, but are the last guests to be seated. The mothers are the last “guests” to be seated, and they get the aisle seats, which are considered to be places of honor.
Grandparents of the Groom
To be seated in the first row on the right, (facing the altar), in the 3rd and 4th seats
Grandparents of the Bride
To be seated in the first row on the left (facing the altar), in the 3rd and 4th seats
An Usher or Groomsman can be designated to escort the Grandmother, with the Grandfather following behind, or the Grandfather can escort the Grandmother.
Mother/Parents of the Groom
First row on the right (facing the altar), in the 1st and 2nd seats (MOG in the aisle seat)
As with the Grandparents, an Usher or Groomsman can be designated to escort the Mother of the Groom, with the Father of the Groom following behind, or the FOG can escort the MOG.
They both will sit, unless you have a Unity Candle, then instead of sitting down, the Mother of the Groom will stand in front of her seat until the Mother of the Bride has been escorted in.
Mother of the Bride
First row on the left (facing the altar), in the 1st (aisle) seat
Usually an Usher or Groomsman is designated to escort the Mother of the Bride.
She will sit down, unless you have a Unity Candle, at which time the Mother of the Bride and the Mother of the Groom will walk up together to light the taper candles, and then take their seats.
If you have an aisle runner, it is usually rolled into place by two designated Ushers/Groomsmen after the mothers have taken their seats. When done, they will take their place in the processional line.
Wedding Party Processional Order
Officiant
Groom
Best Man
Groomsmen
Junior Groomsmen
(The men, except for the Ring Bearer and the Father of the Bride, traditionally either walk in from a side door on the altar)
Junior Bridesmaids
Bridesmaids
Maid/Matron of Honor
Ring Bearer
Flower Girl
Bride and Father of the Bride
Where Do They Stand?
(Note: ‘Left’ and ‘Right’ is in reference to facing the alter, and not specifically the person, as during the Bride’s entrance, the wedding party will often turn slightly so they are facing the bride and as she walks down the aisle, and not have their backs turned toward her).
For a Traditional Christian Ceremony, the Officiant will stand in the center, furthest away from the guests. The rest of the wedding party, including the Bride and Groom, will be closer to the guests. The Groom stands a little off center to the right (when facing the altar), and in front of the Officiant. His Best Man and the rest of the Groomsmen/Junior Groomsmen form a line and stands to his right.
The Maid of Honor stands in a spot that will be to the left of the Bride, with the rest of the Bridesmaids/Junior Bridesmaids to her left.
The Ring Bearer stands slightly to the Best Man’s left, between the Groom and Best Man. And the Flower Girl stands slightly to the Maid of Honor’s right, between the Bride (once she’s taken her place) and Maid of Honor.
Variations within the Traditional Wedding Processional Order
Sometimes the traditional wedding entrance order just doesn’t make sense for you and your partner, or maybe you want to change things up a bit. Here are some alternatives.
• Rather than having them wait to walk down the aisle right before the mothers of the groom and bride, the Grandparents may be seated with the rest of the guests (but still in their first row). This really depends on the bride and groom’s preference, AND on the health/comfort of the grandparents.
• All members of the wedding party walk down the aisle. The Officiant and Groom enter after the mothers have been seated. The rest of the men in the wedding party pair up with the Junior Bridesmaids, Bridesmaids, and Maid/Matron of Honor. Sometimes the Best Man will walk in with the Groom and Officiant, with the Maid of Honor entering by herself. Whether he walks in with the Maid of Honor or accompanying the Groom is up to the Bride and Groom.
• The Groom can escort the Mother of the Groom.
• The Bride’s brother can escort the Mother of the Bride (he does not have to be an usher).
• The Bride’s brother or an uncle escorts her down the aisle, or she can walk by herself.
• What if there are Step Parents involved?
How do they walk in?
- After the grandparents have been seated, the order would be the following:
- • Step Mother of the Groom (escorted by the Father of the Groom or an Usher)
- • Mother of the Groom (escorted by the Step Father of the Groom, if remarried, or by an usher)
- • Step Mother of the Bride (escorted by an usher)
- • Mother of the Bride (escorted by the Step Father of the Bride, if remarried, or an usher)
Who escorts the Bride?
- Depending on the family dynamics, including when the MOB and the SFOB married, and how involved the Step Father is in the Bride’s life, the Bride has a few options:
- • Be escorted by just the her Father
- • Be escorted by just her Step Father
- • Be escorted by both (if the aisle is wide enough, all three can walk in together, or she can have one walk her halfway up the aisle and the other escort her the rest of the way)
- • She can be escorted by a brother or uncle
- • She can walk in by herself
And here do they all sit?
- If the Mother of the Bride/Groom is remarried, her current spouse sits next to her. Traditional “rules” put the Father of the Bride/Groom, and his current spouse if remarried, in the third row, 1st and 2nd seats. Depending on your family dynamics, and how well everyone gets along, you may do like many couples have, and have both sets of parents/stepparents in the first row.
• If your Bridesmaids/Groomsmen sides are uneven, then you have three options:
- • one person enters by themself
- • two Bridesmaids/Groomsmen pair up and enter together
- • two Bridesmaids enter with one Groomsman/two Groomsmen enter with one Bridesmaid
• There’s “safety in numbers” so to help out any little ones who are too shy to walk by themselves, the Ring Bearer and Flower Girl can walk in together. Or if you have more than one Ring Bearer and/or Flower Girl they can pair up.
• Wondering how to include more than one little boy in the wedding party?
- • Have more than one ring bearer. Each can carry one ring on a pillow, box, or what ever you’ve chosen.
- • Have a page boy. The original duty of a page boy is to help with the bride’s train, but it’s perfectly fine to have a page boy walk down the aisle with the rest of the little ones, doing nothing more than looking cute and adorable.
• Although a Flower Girls Maid/Matron of Honor, and Bridesmaid are traditionally female, and a Ring Bearer, Best Man, and Groomsman are traditionally male, sometimes, based on the people in your life, these titles just won’t work. Maybe your groom wants his sister in the role of “Best Man,” or your best friend identifies as gender-neutral, or maybe you and your partner aren’t a “bride and groom” (just a few examples). What do you call these people in your wedding party? Here a some suggestions:
- • Bride = Gride, Bridegroom
- • Groom = Broom, Bridegroom
- • Maid/Matron of Honor = Man of Honor, Friend of Honor, Person of Honor
- • Best Man = Best Woman, Best Lady, Best Person
- • Bridesmaid = Bridesman, Brides’ Attendant, Honor Attendant
- • Groomsman = Groomswoman, Groomsperson, Grooms’ Attendant, Honor Attendant
- • Flower Girl = Flower Child, Flower Person
Traditional Wedding Processional Order
(Jewish Ceremony)
Rabbi and cantor walk in together
Grandparents of the Bride (and are seated in the front row on the right)
Grandparents of the Groom (and are seated in the front row on the left)
Ushers/Groomsmen
Best Man
Groom, with his parents (FOG on his left, and MOG on his right)
Bridesmaids
Maid/Matron of Honor
Ring Bearer
Flower Girl
Bride with her parents (FOB on her left, and MOB on her right)
Variations within the Traditional Wedding Processional Order
• The Bridesmaids can pair up with the Groomsmen and enter after the Grandparents.
Where Do They Stand?
The wedding ceremony takes place underneath a marriage canopy called a huppah, (also huppah, chupah, or chuppa), which symbolizes the couple’s new home.
The bride, groom, and rabbi stand underneath the huppah. The bride stands on the groom’s right and the rabbi faces them. If the huppah is large enough, the parents of the bride and groom also stand underneath. The Maid of Honor stands to the bride’s right, and the Best Man to the groom’s left. The Bridesmaids and Groomsmen do not stand under the huppah, but line up on either side of it (Bridesmaids to the Maid of Honor’s right, Groomsmen to the Best Man’s left).
Have you ever seen or done something different from the traditional wedding party processional order? Let me know in the comments below!
Photo Credits:
Silhouette of a Wedding Party – ClipArtMax
Wedding Party Lined Up – Weddings From The Heart
Bride and her Father – Monique Studios
Hearts, Joy, Love!
Jean
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