Introducing your future spouse to family is nerve wracking. We’ve all seen the many countless scenes in sitcoms where the son or daughter nervously introduces their future spouse to their parents. Will they like them, or will they have a talk with you later about how you could ‘do better’?
On tv it’s funny, but in reality it can be an extremely anxious time. Yes, this happens real life too. Couples may not want to talk about it as it can become hurtful to a relationship. Nevertheless, it has to be done if a relationship is really to move onto the marriage phase.
Weddings are amazing, but a black cloud can hang over them when parents have an issue of some sort. There may be smiles on the surface but there will be tension and anger below the waterline. Why is it so hard then, to introduce your partner to your family?
The Father’s Approval
All too often, the father’s approval is overlooked in the media but in the real world, it’s a very serious matter. The father is the one who will test the groom and ask them questions about life. Maybe the mother’s own tests are valid but they often are more so to do with feelings and emotional connections. The father on the other hand, will test the man in your life on finances, future goals regarding his professional life and career.
There will be a time when he will surmise whether or not your partner can physically protect you and has a safe pair of hands when it comes to life and death situations. Your dad is trying to see if the man you hope to marry can make sure you are okay when he eventually is not able to.
A Strict Vice
Many families are hopeful that their son or daughter will get married to someone whose views and values are close to theirs. Many times this is political as there is friction between couples that don’t agree on the fundamentals of life and governance. It’s not uncommon for households to have a fall out over who should be the leader of the country and serious issues on law and order.
On the other hand a vice like the belief in the afterlife is crucial for some parents as religious views are strongly held. Hence why some individuals may want to look for someone that is going to fit their beliefs and go onto sites like Muslim Dating, Christian Dating, Jewish Dating, or just about any other religious viewpoint.
Nevertheless, parents may also want someone that is capable of thinking both ways and therefore want someone who is not strict on any kind of vice.
First Impressions Count
The classic reason why so many couples are anxious when introducing their loved one to their family is because of the first impression they might give off. We’re all individuals and your partner may be quirky, make strange jokes that only you get but to others sound insulting. They might sweat a lot when nervous and not present a good image at first sight. If you can play through the roles and imagine meeting parents and get more comfortable before you actually do, this could help calm nerves.
Before the wedding, it’s vital that parents like your other half. The day can go so much smoother if they trust your judgement and try to make your soon-to-be-spouse feel welcome into the family.
* This is a contributed post
I hope you found this information useful!
Hearts, Joy, Love!
Jean
For planning help and unique ideas for your wedding call or text me at 937-581-3647, or email me at jean@weddingsfromtheheart.net!