When planning your wedding, you’ll have lots of questions. Below are 10 more questions about wedding planning that brides and grooms have asked me, and my answers:
1) What were the least enjoyable parts of other people’s weddings?
Anything that makes the guests have to sit and wait:
• Long lines for the buffet.
• Long lines for the restroom.
• A cocktail hour that is longer than an hour.
• A ceremony that doesn’t start on time. (A few minutes is fine, 30 minutes or more is not).
• Extremely long toasts. (Keep them to 2-3 minutes tops).
• Too many people making toasts and speeches. (The best man and maid of honor is expected, and the happy couple thanking their guests for coming or a welcome toast by the parents is a nice touch. Passing the mic is not!)
• Long ceremonies that your guests aren’t familiar with. (Have a ceremony that reflects your heritage, culture, and religion. But if it’s unfamiliar with a majority of your guests, include a detailed program so they can follow along and know what is happening).
2) What are some non-edible wedding favors for guests?
Useful items, such as bottle openers, candles, bath bombs, soap, wine bottle stoppers, and playing cards are good non-edible wedding favor options. A popular wedding favor choice right now are custom hand sanitizer bottles.
Be careful with the personalization. Items with your names and wedding date – such as wine glasses or coasters – look cute, but your guests aren’t likely to keep them around for long. Think of it this way, how long would you really keep things in your house that has someone else’s name and wedding date printed on it? Personalize items with removable tags instead.
3) Would you recommend doing a “first look” video for your wedding?
Absolutely! If a couple is doing a “first look” (which I love), and having a videographer, why would they omit such an emotional moment from their video? If they prefer to keep it private, they can make arrangements with the videographer that only their copy includes the first look, and all others (such as copies of the video for their parents) do not.
4) What are your best tips for staying calm during wedding planning?
Communication – with your fiancé, with your families, with your wedding professionals. Make sure they understand what you are wanting AND make sure you hear them as well.
Compromise – with your fiancé (it’s his/her wedding too!)
Organization (and pace yourself) – break down your wedding planning tasks into smaller bites.
Relax – On your wedding day just let the day happen and enjoy it. Behind the scenes your wedding professionals will ensure things go the way you want it to be. Consider hiring a wedding coordinator to oversee everything on the weekend of your wedding.
5) During the wedding ceremony, does the bride keep her engagement ring on and have the groom place the wedding band on top of it?
Wondering what to do with her engagement is one of the most common questions about wedding planning. The bride has a few different options. She can keep her engagement on and have the groom place the wedding band on top of it if she wants.
Most brides move their engagement ring onto another finger (often the ring finger of their right hand) prior to the ceremony, then move it back to the left hand (so the wedding band is on first [closest to the heart]). Others briefly remove it right before the ring exchange, then put it back on. Sometimes (usually if the engagement doesn’t fit another finger, or it won’t look right on another finger), they’ll have their Maid of Honor wear it (so it is close at hand), or have someone else hold onto it for them for safe keeping.
It really depends on the bride’s preference.
6) Do wedding crashers ever steal gifts?
Yes they do. Always? Probably not, but it would be too easy for them to help themselves. Their reason to be there is not to celebrate the newlyweds. Their intent is for their own personal gain, whether it’s stealing gifts and gift envelopes, to enjoying the food, drinks, and entertainment. Some may thrive on the thrill on not getting caught.
7) What is the origin of the bride wearing a white wedding gown?
When Queen Victoria wed Prince Albert in 1840, she had some special Horniton lace that she wanted to be used for her wedding dress. White silk satin was chosen as they felt it best showed off the lace. Although she wasn’t the first person to wear a white dress for her wedding, white wedding dresses caught on in popularity after her choice.
What does a white wedding dress symbolize? Really, in today’s society it doesn’t symbolize anything other than a wedding dress. Some people believe that a white wedding dress symbolizes purity, but this was never the original intent.
8) How would you respond to an evening wedding invitation where dinner will be catered but only the bride and groom will get wine, it says “No Alcohol Please” on the entrée selection cards, so guests can’t even BYOB?
The purpose to attend someone’s wedding is to celebrate their wedding day. There are many ways to celebrate, including no alcohol. If I was close to the couple, I’d happily accept and attend their wedding. If I wasn’t close to them, I may decline. The reason for accepting or declining has nothing to do with the beverages to be provided.
9) Is it OK to demote a member of your wedding party?
Only in extreme cases. Demoting a member of the wedding party usually has long-lasting negative affects on the relationship you have with that person.
Some acceptable reasons are:
1) You are scaling back the entire wedding due to budget reasons, or COVID, so having a large wedding party wouldn’t work.
2) The person is unable to attend your wedding.
3) A pregnant bridesmaid’s due date is on or near your wedding date (and being in the wedding & attending/planning pre-wedding events will be difficult).
4) A member of the wedding party financially cannot participate (costs of wedding party attire and pre-wedding events can quickly add up).
10) Why do people invite kids to weddings and expect them to not misbehave?
Another one of the common questions about wedding planning deals with children.
It’s important to remember that there’s a difference between children who misbehave and children who act like children. The expectation for them not to “misbehave” is not unreasonable, as it implies the expectation that the parents are going to properly watch their own children. While a guest certainly wants to enjoy the party, if they have their children in attendance, keeping an eye on them should take top priority.
Now, to expect children to act like “little adults” and not the children that they are is unreasonable. No matter how well behaved a child is, a wedding isn’t typically geared to them, they will get bored, and they will find something to if not given something to do. Have a kids table, have kid-friendly activities, have event on-site childcare.
What are your questions about wedding planning? Let me know in the comments below, or shoot me a message in the “Have questions about your wedding plans? Ask Jean!” box in the sidebar.
Photo Credit:
Susan Cipriano via PXHere CC0 Public Domain
Hearts, Joy, Love!
Jean
Looking for fun ideas, or need help with your wedding plans?
Weddings From The Heart can help. Contact me today at jean@weddingsfromtheheart.net or by phone or text at 937-581-3647!