Everyone loves a wedding. Some love it so much that they choose to have a wedding vow renewal.
Photo Credit: Kenneth Surillo via Pexels
There is a continuing interest in renewing or reaffirming one’s wedding vows. Couples may choose to repeat their original wedding vows or they may write new ones that express the way their love has grown over the years.
What Is A Wedding Vow Renewal?
A wedding vow renewal (also called a recommitment ceremony or reaffirming vows) is not the same as a second wedding, since you are already legally married, and aren’t getting married during this event.
Why Renew Your Wedding Vows?
Renewing/reaffirming your wedding vows is a romantic way to celebrate a significant anniversary. Some other reasons couples choose to reaffirm their vows are:
• To have the more formal event not provided by a civil ceremony
• Maybe their original wedding was small (due to budget restrictions, or other factors such as the Covid pandemic) and they want to celebrate their love with all their loved ones present
• Perhaps they want to re-commit after overcoming a serious life challenge such as a serious injury or illness
• Maybe they want to do something different that they didn’t or weren’t able to include in their original wedding
• To reaffirm their love and commitment to each other
Photo Credit: Darya Sannikova via Pexels
Differences Between a Wedding Ceremony and a Wedding Vow Renewal
While planning this “I’d do it all over again with you” event is similar to planning your original wedding, there are some differences between a wedding and a wedding vow renewal, such as:
• Since you’re already legally married no marriage license is necessary.
• Neither is it necessary to have an officiant who can legally perform a wedding ceremony.
• For a more intimate event with close friends and family only, short handwritten notes are fine. (Otherwise, printed invitations are issued so guests know what to expect).
• Generally, attire for the event is dressy but not as formal as that for a wedding. As with any event, the attire reflects the celebration tone.
• The bride may choose to carry a smaller bouquet than what she originally had.
• Rather than having her father walk her down the aisle, instead the couple often walks down the aisle together.
A wedding vow renewal is a ceremony where the married couple renews or reaffirms their marriage vows and commitment to one another.
And, as with an original wedding:
• A reaffirmation of vows can be as elaborate or as simple as the couple wants.
• You may have the ceremony and a reception in your home if there is room. Or you may hold both in the church where you were first married, or at the church you now attend. If it’s going to be a bigger event than just family, plan using the guidelines for a second wedding.
• Your wedding vow renewal can be as large or as small as you want it to be.
• You can exchange wedding rings if you want, but it is not required. While most couples re-exchange their original rings, some add new wedding bands.
• You can wear a traditional wedding dress (or any other type of outfit you prefer).
• You can have a wedding party if you want, although it’s not necessary. If you do want a wedding party, asking your original wedding party members stand up with you, or having your children or grandchildren fill these roles is a nice, sentimental touch.
FAQs of Wedding Vow Renewals
What are the rules for renewing vows?
The only “rules” for getting married are 1) you need a marriage license, and 2) you need an officiant who can legally perform the wedding. Since you’re already married, those 2 rules don’t apply to a vow renewal.
So there are no “rules” for renewing your wedding vows. However a few things that are not appropriate when having a wedding vow renewal are 1) a gift registry, 2) a bridal shower, and 3) a bachelor/bachelorette party.
What do you say when you renew your wedding vows?
The vows for your renewal are quite similar wedding vows. The difference is that the vows, (as well as the officiant’s welcome address to the guests, their address to the couple, and the couple’s vows to each other), reflects the continuation of your intent and promises made on your wedding day.
I love the sentiment of the following excerpt from a welcome address found on Wedding Forward.
“a couple meets . . . falls in love . . . then take the final step—tying the knot. But the final step in a couple’s relationship isn’t marriage—it only marks the beginning of a grand adventure . . .”
So, what can you say in your vows? You can find several lovely examples from Minted, including:
“________, 25 years ago, I pledged my love and commitment to you. I promised to love you, honor you, comfort and keep you. I pledged to be by your side in sickness and in health, in times of want, and times of plenty, for better or worse, for the rest of our lives. We have had all of those things, and you have been by my side as we created a family, a home, and a life together. Today, at the beginning of our 26th year as husband/wife and husband/wife, in the presence of God, and our family and friends, I renew my vows to you, pledging my eternal love for you, and eagerly awaiting what life may bring us.”
How long should you be married before renewing your vows?
While most couples wait for a milestone anniversary year (5, 10, 25, or 50 years) there is no rule that says they have to wait a certain amount of time. One week, 1 year, 10 years, or not at all? Totally up to you.
When you renew your vows does your anniversary date change?
No, since you are not actually getting married at your vow renewal. Some couples choose to do their vow renewal on their anniversary, but it is not necessary.
What does the groom wear to vow renewal?
As with the original wedding, the groom wears something that fits the style and color scheme of the event.
Do you do a cake cutting at a wedding vow renewal?
You can if you want to. While other wedding reception formalities (such as the bouquet and garter toss) are usually omitted, having a wedding cake and doing a ceremonial cake cutting is a fun touch.
A wedding vow renewal is a special day for couples. Whether you choose to celebrate it with a picnic in the back yard or with a formal dinner party, with a little planning, it will be special for all who attend.
Have you done or would you consider having a wedding vow renewal? Let me know in the comments below.
Hearts, Joy, Love!
Jean
Author of “Wedding Invitations, RSVPs, and More! Oh My!” and “From ‘I Will’ to ‘I Do’”
Looking for fun ideas, or need help with your wedding plans? Contact me today at [email protected] or by phone or text at 937-581-3647!
