In order to be as helpful as possible, and lessen the stress that comes with planning a wedding, there are many things I do as a wedding planner when working with a couple.
However, there are also some things I don’t do, and – believe it or not – the lack of these things is greatly appreciated by my couples.
1) I Don’t Have A ‘Preferred Vendor List’
Think about it. What is a Preferred Vendor List anyway? It’s a list of vendors that are regularly recommended.
• It’s short (thereby limiting your vendor options).
• It very possibly includes vendors who don’t fit your wedding style. . .
• . . . as well as vendors that are out of your budget.
• Who knows if they’re even available for your wedding date?
There are many reasons that vendors get on a “preferred list.” Often times it’s because the ‘List Holder’ truly loves and believes in their work. However, there are other reasons that have absolutely nothing to do with merit, such as:
• they paid to be on the list.
• they are “buddies” with the list owner.
• reciprocal referrals (the “they referred me so I’ll refer them” mentality).
But I do. . .
. . . base all vendor referrals on your unique wedding planning needs. The referrals I give my couples are always based on three main criteria:
1) they are available for your wedding date.
2) their style fits your wedding vision.
3) their pricing works with your wedding budget.
Photo credit: Childers Photography
2) I Don’t Have A Price List To Give You
Often the first question a bride or groom will ask is “How much do you charge?” I totally get why this is one of the first things they’ll ask. Price and budget is important, and many times a couple isn’t sure what to ask a wedding planner. However, it boggles my mind when I hear of other wedding planners who immediately answer “$xxx,” or have specific prices on their website.
How can I (or they, for that matter) tell you an accurate price without knowing any details of your wedding, and without knowing what you want me to do for you?
• Is your wedding large or small? Planning a wedding for 200+ people is far different than planning one for 75.
• What is your wedding date? A Saturday evening reception is more intensive than a weekday afternoon wedding.
• Do you want me to be hands-on throughout the entire wedding planning stage, or do you just want a little assistance and guidance?
Check out my blog post “Hello – How Much Do You Charge?” for more info.
But I do. . .
. . . base my fees on your specific wedding planning needs.
No two weddings (and the subsequent wedding planning needs) are the same, so my rates are based on each event and the duties I am to perform. I offer a free, initial meeting or phone chat you can tell me more about your wedding vision and needs. That way I won’t quote too high by including things you don’t want, or quote too low and miss things that are really important to you.
3) I Don’t Do “Gay” Weddings
I don’t do “straight” weddings either, or “Christian,” or “Interfaith,” or. . . (I hope you see where I’m going with this).
But I do . . .
. . . weddings.
And my approach to all weddings is the same . . .
Talk with the couple, hear about their wedding vision, discuss wedding practices (traditional and not-so-traditional then find out which ones the couple want to include, which they want to omit, which they want to tweak to fit them, as well as what other ideas they would like to include.
No two weddings are the same. And I have no preconceived ideas of how a wedding should be.
Why? Because the couples aren’t the same.
Each have their own “must haves” and “no ways” and it isn’t based on any label. Other than a wedding needing two people, a marriage license, and someone who can legally perform the wedding ceremony, everything else is based on your wedding needs and desires.
I won’t pigeon-hole you or make suggestions/recommendations based on anything other what YOU want for your wedding day.
4) I Don’t Promise A “Perfect” Wedding Day
It’s your wedding day, so of course you want everything to be perfect, and believe me, as a wedding planner I want your wedding day to be perfect too. But . . .
Sorry, but this is real life. Stuff happens that is out of our control. There is no “take two.”
As Preston Bailey has written, “The beauty of any wedding or event is that it happens only once. It’s not a dress rehearsal. I honestly don’t think there is such a thing as the perfect event.”
Several years ago, I had the honor to be quoted by him on his blog regarding this subject. “I completely agree with Jean Neuhart, of Weddings From The Heart, who commented on my blog yesterday. She said, ‘There’s no perfection in real life. All we can strive for is the best that is humanly possible.’” (I wish I had done a screen shot of the post, as since then, he has revamped his website and blog, and it isn’t on the internet anymore).
But I do. . .
Instead of promising a perfect wedding day, I will promise that you are my #1 priority, and with honesty and integrity I am looking out for you. You can rely on me to alleviate the stress, and offer creative, budget-minded ideas so you have peace of mind, and can relax, have fun, and enjoy the wedding day of your dreams.
Hearts, Joy, Love!
Jean
Need help with your wedding plans? Looking for some fun and unique ideas? I’d love to help. Contact me today at [email protected] or by phone or text at 937-581-3647!
