A while back we talked about 4 Tips to Create Your Wedding Budget. The first thing on this list was “Know What You Both Want” and the importance of sitting down with your fiancé before you start with any of the wedding plans and talking in detail about what you both want for your wedding day.
The following is a great example of why it’s so important to sit down with your fiance/fiancee and talk (in detail) about what you both want for your wedding day BEFORE you do any actual wedding planning, and before you hire any vendors or book a venue!
I recently heard a disheartening story of a bride who had her wedding color scheme all figured out. She was so happy and excited with her colors, and how they worked so well with the bridesmaids dresses that she had picked out.
A big problem arose when her fiancé told her he did not like the color scheme. On top of that, the color scheme he chose for his groomsmen’s attire does not work with the bride’s color scheme (in the bride’s opinion).
This “crisis” was likely caused by one of the following:
1. They did not sit down together to discuss what they both had in mind for their wedding day.
2. They did talk about their wedding day ideas, but didn’t go into the details.
3. They did talk about their wedding day ideas, but didn’t listen to what the other had in mind.
And it could have been averted had the couple done either of the following
1. Sat down and talked in detail with each other about what they both were thinking about, and wanted for their wedding day, then incorporating both of their ideas into one plan of action.
2. Told the other what they had in mind, before making any plans or decisions, to make sure what they had in mind would work with what the other had in mind.
Some of you may be thinking, “Well, big deal. It’s only what the wedding party are wearing.” But, yes, it is a big deal. Why? Well, in the first place, something has been decided on and /or planned for that both the bride and groom do not like. And, in the second place (which puts this in better perspective), if they didn’t talk about what their wedding party is going to wear, the likelihood is higher that they didn’t talk about any other wedding ideas.
Communication and compromise are key for any marriage, and it starts with your wedding planning. You aren’t getting married by yourself, there are two people involved, therefore there will be two separate sets of thoughts and opinions about what the wedding day will be like.
Many of these thoughts and opinions will beautifully mesh together. Sometimes what is very important to one, is at the bottom of the list for the other.
Gone are the days when the bride would handle the wedding plans by herself, or with her mother; with the groom’s only input was showing up on the day itself. A wedding day is about both people, not just one.
Also, don’t assume that your partner isn’t interested, or couldn’t care less about any wedding detail, including color schemes. While it may not be at the top of their list of what’s important, it is likely that they DO have something in mind.
Work as a team and you’ll end up with a beautiful day that reflects both you and your partner.
Photo Credit: alexramos10 via needpix
Hearts, Joy, Love!
Jean
Do you have a question or wedding concern? Let me know.
Weddings From The Heart can help. Contact me today at jean@weddingsfromtheheart.net or by phone or text at 937-581-3647!