Figuring out your guest list can be stressful enough. Deciding whether to invite kids can add to the stress level. Do you want children at your wedding?
You may have already noticed this, but other people have their own ideas on what they believe to be the “right way” about planning a wedding β including inviting children β and arenβt shy about expressing these opinions.
First off – remember that this is YOUR wedding, and you can invite (or not invite) whomever you choose. There is no right or wrong here. It’s up to you and your partner whether you should have children at your wedding.
Second β donβt feel bad about choosing something that others may think is not the right choice. And donβt let anyone make you feel bad about it either β if the shoe were on the other foot, they wouldnβt want anyone telling them what they should or shouldnβt do.
Inviting Children
If you choose to have children at your wedding, remember that they are not small adults, and shouldnβt be expected to act that way. Kids perceive wedding receptions, and how to behave when attending one, very differently than adults.
Adults realize that there is a lot of sitting and watching involved in a wedding reception β not so much doing β at least until the party gets rolling. Kids are active, they want to do, they get bored sitting and watching.
I always say that if kids arenβt given something to do, theyβll find something to do β and itβs usually not what they should be doing. They will run round and round the cake table; they’ll run up and down the hallways; they’ll run in circles on the dance floor; they will run in between all the guestsβ tables. (Really, they do a lot of running!)
And even with mom and dad there, kids are often left unsupervised. (Sorry, but too many people DO NOT watch their own children while attending a wedding reception).
Give the kids something to do!Β Provide a scavenger hunt, age appropriate toys and activities at special “kids only” tables, a balloon artist β something they can enjoy, stay occupied, and be made to feel like part of the event.
Not Inviting Children
There are many valid reasons for not inviting children βΒ perhaps yourΒ venueΒ isnβt “kid friendly” β you know the kind thatβs decorated with antiques or has a large pond on the premises; or maybeΒ you really want your wedding day to be an adult-only event. Regardless of your reason, the fact that you chose to not invite children is your decision and it should be respected.
If anyone questions your “no kids” decision, (and there will be guests who just donβt understand why they canβt bring little Johnny or Suzie), explain it this way, “We want our guests to enjoy a night out without the kids, that way they can party, have some drinks, and actually eat their dinner without having to cut up somebodyβs food.” And when they express their dilemma of what to do with little Johnny or Suzie, remember β thatβs what babysitters are for!
This may be somewhat trickier for your out-of-town guests β but arrangements can be made. So if you don’t want children at your wedding but anticipate some of your guests bringing their little ones along, consider hiring a sitter, and get a local hotel room or a conference room at the reception venue so parents can drop off their little ones on their way to the party.
Hearts, Joy, Love!
Jean
Do you have a wedding dilemma or question you need answered? Iβd love to help. Contact me at [email protected] or at 937-581-3647!
Photo credit: – Β© Mat Hayward – Fotolia.com
We love kids at weddings and receptions. Hire us to watch the kids at the event. Mobile Mommies event childcare service.